Wednesday, September 3, 2014

A Healthy Goodbye

Oh boy! Family visiting is always a bittersweet thing for me. On the one hand, I get to spend precious time with people I love, but on the other hand, I know that I will have to say goodbye at some point. On one hand, we get to eat out (and have extra help with the kiddos) but on the other hand, I eat way more than I normally would (and it might not be a part of my "normal" diet.) On the one hand, we get to do fun things like explore Uptown Sedona, or Jerome, but on the other hand, I spend more Fun Dollars than I plan on using.

I love every visit from family, and I go into each visit knowing that I will eat and drink more than what I am used to, I will spend money I don't mean to, and not have as much "normal" time doing things like grocery shopping. I know that no trip will last forever and that at some point, a goodbye is in order.

First, let's talk about all that extra spending I did. As many of you know, I am about to gift someone $50.00 out of my own pocket. Since Fun Dollars are mine to spend any way that I want, I want to share the fun by giving someone else half of my Fun Dollars for one pay cycle. I have been saving up for the past few pay cycles to fund this gift. But when my parents were visiting, I mingled my saved Fun Dollars with my expendable Fun Dollars. I think it might have gone towards bottles of wine, but I'm not sure. This is a spending behavior that seems to occur every time there are visitors. I am not particularly sad or disappointed about it, it's just something I have noticed. So, I can be more aware of it the next time family is in town.

Which brings me to my next point, saying goodbye. I have done this enough times that I have found new ways of dealing with the sadness that accompanies the departure of family after a visit. I used to dive into a tub of ice cream, or splurge on a bottle of wine that Corey and I would finish in a night. Pretty much anything to dull the pain of loss would do the trick. Since I have been eating differently, I have noticed that my moods are better managed without the need for "poisonous" indulgences. In reality, my body is looking for a sugar high or the dullness of alcohol to numb the pain. But since I am now used to "running on a cleaner system", my body doesn't seek out these methods for coping.

I kid you not, as soon as I left the airport after dropping off my parents yesterday, my body said, "Feed me a salad!" I even considered for a moment my freedom of choice in Flagstaff (where the airport was) with only one child in the car (Carrick was back at school). I could go for a mocha at Starbucks. I could get a Long John covered in chocolate at Dunkin' Doughnuts. I could even binge on a double scoop waffle cone at Baskin Robbins, but none of those options really sounded good to me. I truly wanted a salad. And in honesty, I felt better about my choice and about saying goodbye as I ate my Wildflower Salad topped with salmon.

Lily slept in my lap and I enjoyed every mouthful of my salad. I put her in the car when I was finished and we drove to Old Navy. That's where I did my "consolation shopping". I used family money to go clothing shopping for Lily. Yes, I know that I could go to Goodwill, or wait for a clothing swap, but I wanted my girl to have some actual new clothes for when she started school. It will be her first time in daycare next week, and I knew how fast she would go through clothes. Playing with other children, feeding herself lunch, I would need to bring a change of clothes for her every day. Also, she deserves some non-hand-me-down clothes too. I had no time limit to shop, so I just pawed through all the summer clearance items for little girls. I even found a swimsuit for $10.00 that I bought for myself. All said and done I spent $20.00 on a week's worth of clothes for Lily, and I felt 100% okay with my parents leaving.

No ice cream, no wine, no chocolate, just a salad and some (necessary) shopping. That's a much healthier way to say goodbye.

Lunch at Wildflower- $7.00
Balance this pay cycle- $93.00
Happy Spending!

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